Dancing Around The Truth
by spottedhorse
Summary: Greg plans a party. The resulting fireworks have repercussions for Grissom, Sara, and Catherine Feedback would be appreciated.
1. Chapter 1

It was a slow shift at CSI that night. Perhaps that's how the idea had been born, out of boredom. Once conceived, it took root and grew in the mind of Greg Sanders. By the end of shift all the arrangements had been made and the invitations extended. Had the graveyard supervisor known what his newest CSI had been planning, he would have assigned Greg some work; something along the lines of inventorying the supply closet. But Gil Grissom was not aware of Greg's plan until the end of shift. The entire group had conspired to keep him out of the loop. But as he was signing out, Greg approached. He extended the written invitation to his boss. "You gotta come, boss. It wouldn't be a good party without you."

Grissom took the paper from Greg's hand and opened it.

_You are invited to the Bachelor Party of_

_SUPER DAVE_

_Saturday Night_

_7:00 pm until…._

_Wild Woody's Bar_

"Greg…" Grissom cocked his head and the younger man knew what was coming, "I don't think so."

"Aw come on, Grissom. It's Super Dave. He's getting married; we gotta do something about it."

"I intend to send a very nice gift," Grissom replied.

"Hey Grissom, don't be a party pooper….." she was laughing at him from somewhere behind. He turned to see the smiling face of Sara Sidle. "Come on, it'll be fun," she coaxed.

Grissom blinked. Just hours ago they had been discussing plans for a date tomorrow night. "You're going?" he inquired, still puzzled the apparent change of plans.

"Of course, it's Dave. It's a special time for him and I want to be a part of it."

Grissom looked from her back to Greg. "Okay, I'll go…..for a little while. But Greg.."

"Yeah"

"Wild Woody's?" Grissom's eyebrow was up and he was teasing now.

Saturday night arrived and the gang began to arrive at Wild Woody's. Grissom was impressed by the gathering. Almost the whole graveyard was there, lab rats included. Also, Brass, Doc Robbins, and Sofia had been invited. Grissom found a table near the back and watched as his colleagues danced, shot pool, and played darts. After a few minutes, Doc joined him. Before long Brass and Catherine were there too.

"So, Papa Bear," Brass teased his friend, "proud of the little gathering arranged by the wild child?"

Grissom looked across the table at Catherine. "Seems like it was not too long ago some one else was accusing me of fathering this bunch." His eyes were twinkling.

Catherine looked over the rim of her beer glass, her eyes twinkling back.

"Well Jim," chimed in Doc, "If he's Papa Bear, what does that make us?"

"Dutch Uncles, I hope," chuckled Jim.

The four sat watching as Sofia relieved Nick of a ten spot over darts. "She's amazing," commented Brass. "She takes his money and he's laughing about it."

Catherine glanced sideways at the detective and smiled. She thought there was something going on there but…..then another thought struck. Usually Sara was hovering wherever Gil went. But she was dancing with Greg and Gil seemed oblivious. The music changed and a slow song began.

"Catherine, my best dancing days are over but if these two lugs aren't going to ask….may I have the honor?" asked Doc.

"Why Doc, that's the best offer I've had all night." And they headed to the floor.

Gil Grissom took a long sip of his beer. Out of the corner of his eye, Jim noticed and wondered the cause. As Sofia walked away from Nick, Jim saw his opening and left to go ask her to dance. Gil sat at the table, chugging beer and watching his friends enjoy each other. He was happy that they were having such a good time….but…..why was he feeling sad. You know, you idiot. Because you're just going to sit here and watch, like you always do. Coward.

Doc and Catherine came back just as the waitress was bringing Gil another beer. Catherine noted that it was his third. Gil usually stopped with one. What's with him, she wondered. Brass and Sofia walked up and Jim asked Catherine to dance. He didn't want it to be obvious that he had made a point of dancing with Sofia. He wasn't ready for that yet. So he played the part of a player.

Nick and Warrick had challenged each other at pool and the other CSIs had gathered around to watch. Gil watched as Sara laughed and alternately cheered or teased them. She should be with one of them, he thought. They're closer in age and she would enjoy more of the same things with them. I'm too old. Yeah, Gil….too old. He drained another mug and signaled for fresh one.

Catherine left the group and sat back at the table. He's on the fifth one, she thought. Need to get him doing something bedsides drinking himself into a coma. "Hey, Gil….we haven't danced tonight. Come on, I want to dance and everyone else is ragging on Nick over there."

"Don't want to dance," he slurred.

"Well, I do and you're elected. Come on," she grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the dance floor.

Once there, he decided just to dance with her and get it over with. He held her in his arm and gathered her hand into his. Through his beer haze he realized that she was watching him, watching his face. Her blue gaze broke through the blur and he found his eyes locked with hers. He went into one of his trances, except instead of being a 'think trance,' he was lost in her eyes. He had danced with her before…lots of times. Why had she never had this effect before? But he knew deep down that she had. He's just never let himself register it. She felt good in his arms, he thought. He wished he hadn't had so many beers now. His feet felt like lead. He usually could dance better than this and for some reason he wanted to prove it to her.

Jim Brass saw them dancing. Gil was having trouble and was all over her. She can't be enjoying this, he thought. He eased his way over and as the song ended, he cut in. Gil shuffled back to the table. Another beer.

Sara was dancing with Nick now, but Gil didn't care. He was watching Cath with Jim. He loved the way she moved, her grace and elegance as she danced. He wanted to dance with her again, wanted to hold her, feel her body in rhythm with his. That is if he could manage any rhythm in his current state. He made his way back and cut in on Jim, who looked at Catherine. She nodded affirmatively and he moved away.

She found herself back in Gil's hold. His arm was behind her and his hand was holding hers next to him. His face was close…beer, way too much beer, she thought. But she was enjoying this anyway. She loved the way he felt, loved having him so close. He seemed to be enjoying it too. They danced through that number and the next one. His face slipped into the crook of her neck, comfortable in her warmth. He pulled her closer until their bodies were almost one. And he found his rhythm. For Gil Grissom, the rest of the room no longer existed. He was lost in her beauty, her warmth, her sensuality. He wanted to stay there, never leave that moment.

Across the room, Sara had noticed his dance. At first she had been amused by his drunken attempt but as their bodies melded and blended, anger arose in her. Bile inched its way up her throat. Infuriated she made her way to them.

Brass saw her from the table. "Oh no," he declared. "Lover's quarrel. I don't think Sara shares well'," he commented to Doc. Robbins turned to see what Jim was talking about.

Sara stood close to them. Her arms were folded across her chest and her face warned of the immanent eruption. Neither of the dancers seemed aware. "Hey, you BITCH," she yelled as she yanked Catherine's arm, digging fingernails into Cath's arm. "Hey," yelped Cath, stunned.

Gil was appalled. "Sara, what the…"

"And YOU, what the hell do you think you are doing? Dancing with HER….like THAT!"

Gil shook his head, trying to focus. "Why wouldn't I dance with Catherine? We've been dancing for years. She's a good dancer," he rambled drunkenly. "Why'd you attack her?"

Catherine was still standing there, shocked; her hand covering the scratches.

"You're supposed to be dancing with ME, you BASTARD!" Sara screamed.

"I don't want to dance with you if you're going to yell at me. Besides, you were dancing with Nick. Besides, Catherine is a better dancer…"

Catherine's mouth flew open. Brass sighed, "Uh oh." The others couldn't believe what he'd just said. Neither could Grissom. "Oh no, I'm screwed," he thought.

Sara glared at him, she opened her mouth to speak but nothing emerged. Then suddenly, out of nowhere, SMACK. Her hand hit his face so hard that it knocked him off balance. Nick happened to be standing behind him and caught him before he hit the floor. He straightened up, hand to his face, and glared at her. He said nothing. His glare said everything. She turned and stormed out of the bar.

He turned to his dance partner, "Cath, I am sorry. I am so sorry. Did she hurt you, let me see." He walked her back to the table and moved her hand from her arm. The scratches were just scratches, but they were deep. Doc eased over to take a look. "Nothing too bad, Catherine. But you do need to get them cleaned out and bandaged. She cut deep," Doc reported.

Gil went to his truck to retrieve his first aid kit. Sara was in the parking lot. She flew out from between the cars at him. "What the hell were you doing in there?" she asked.

"I was dancing. And now I'm trying to get my first aid kit so we can get Catherine's arm cleaned up."

"Oh, she's not hurt that bad. You just want to make more puppy dog eyes at her and be her hero some more. Why did you do that? Why did you have to dance with her….like THAT?"

"You were enjoying yourself, Sara. And I wasn't included. And I was tired of sitting by myself. And Cath and I have been friends for years. Why wouldn't I dance with her?"

"But you…she….you were so close. Like you were making love to her or something."

"Maybe it is a good thing. That this happened, I mean. I never thought it could work between us. There's too much….many differences. Tonight just proves it. I'm going back in to help Cath. And then I'm going home. I want to be alone tonight, Sara. You understand? Alone." He turned and walked back into the bar.

Alone in the parking lot, Sara realized what she had done. She had broken all the unspoken rules for dating Grissom. He wouldn't forgive her easily, if at all. She got in her car and headed for the closest bar.

Back inside, Gil sat next to Catherine and gently tended her scratches. "I am so sorry, Catherine. I never thought she would do something like that."

"Gil, I'm not going to rant and tell you 'I told you so,' but she's had a short fuse for a long time. Something was bound to happen."

He sighed deeply and admitted, "I know."

Brass approached, "Gil, you're not driving yourself home. You've had too many beers. I'll take you and we can come back for your truck in the morning."

Gil shrugged his shoulders and walked out with his friend. Softly, from the other side of the table Doc spoke, "Catherine, when are you two going to stop this and admit you love each other?"

"I don't know, Doc. But it has to come from him and I don't think he is ready. If I say anything it will scare him and he'll never find the courage to do anything about it."

Doc was forced to admit that she was right.


	2. Chapter 2

By the time Sara stumbled out of her last bar, Gil was passed out on his couch, where Jim Brass had dumped him. She found her car and spilled in behind the wheel. After some fumbling, she managed to put the key in the ignition and then collapsed in the front seat. She too had passed out.

Sometime around dawn, she woke up. Her head was groggy and she was still heavily under the influence, but she was conscious. Memories from the night before flooded into her mind and her anger began to boil. She was angry at him and she was angry with herself. And she blamed the bitch. She started her car and left the parking lot.

A few minutes later she arrived at her destination. As she parked on the street, just down from his town home, infuriation was overflowing. His car was not there. Yeah, sure, she thought to herself. Want to be alone. You bastard, you're with her. You sorry son of a bitch, she thought. She rested her head on the headrest behind her and dozed off.

Jim Brass arrived a few hours later to take Gil to get his car. When Grissom opened his door to his friend, it was evident that his head had cleared. The two men walked to Jim's car and drove away, never noticing Sara's car down the street.

The sound of car doors awakening her, she shook off her sleepiness and looked around. His car was still not there. Her blood began to boil as anger surged through her body. I'll show him, she thought. And again she started her car.

Brass pulled into Wild Woody's parking lot and looked at his friend, "Sure, you're okay to drive?"

"Yeah, thanks Jim. I appreciate you not letting me drive last night. Didn't need to compound my stupidity by wrapping the car around a pole….or worse."

"Hey, you've done the same for me, remember?"

Gil climbed out of his friend's car and headed for his own. As he slipped in behind the wheel, a strange sensation passed through him. He had an uneasy feeling as he drove toward home. Gil Grissom was a scientist. He didn't believe in gut feelings or hunches. But he had one now and it told him to check on Catherine. He turned his car abruptly and headed in the direction of her house. When he pulled into her driveway, he knew something was wrong.

Her front door stood wide open. He ran into her house calling her name. "Catherine…..Catherine" After checking all around downstairs, he headed up. "Catherine," he called.

"Uncle Gil," he heard from behind Lindsey's door. He swung it open and found her under her covers, curled in a ball crying. As he pulled the covers back, she jumped into his arms screaming.

'Lindsey, where's your mom?" he asked.

"I don't know. I heard shouting and then explosions and then nothing. I was too scared to come out."

"Okay, Lindsey… it's okay. I need to go find your mom though. Stay here….I'll be back as soon as I can."

He hurried down the hall to Catherine's room. She was on the floor….blood was soaking into the carpet. He pulled out his cell, calling for help. Rushing to her he felt for a pulse. Relieved that he found one he looked at her wound. Blood was oozing from her side. He could only see one hit. He grabbed a towel from the bath and tried to apply pressure, knowing his efforts might buy her a little time. As he held the towel to her side, he surveyed the scene. Bullet holes dotted the wall behind her bed. She must have been asleep when someone came in and peppered the wall. Were they trying to shoot her and were a terrible shot….or were they trying to scare her and tragically missed? He couldn't answer that question.

The EMTs rushed in and Gil relinquished his spot beside her. Brass and Nick followed a few minutes later. Gil was in Lindsey's room, trying to comfort her. When he saw Nick in the hall, he turned to Lindsey, 'Hurry and get dressed, honey. We'll follow your mom to the hospital."

Walking into the hall he spoke to Nick, "Go over everything. I want whoever did this and I want them fast."

"You know it, boss. I'll take care of the scene. They won't get away with it. Warrick is on his way too."

Brass was standing in the bedroom, shaking his head. "Man," he said to his friend. "What the hell was this all about?"

"I don't know but we're sure as hell going to find out," vowed Gil.

He and Lindsey followed the ambulance to Desert Palm. Brass had called Lily and she showed up a few minutes later. The trio waited for word on Catherine. Eventually, the doctor emerged. "She's in surgery to get the bullet. It seems to have missed anything vital. She did lose a lot of blood but we gave her some. I think she'll be fine but she's going to be sore for awhile."

"Thanks, Doc," said Gil.

"I'll have the nurse notify you when she goes to recovery. And then she'll be moved to a room. You'll be able to see her then."

Lindsey hugged her grandmother tightly. "Uncle Gil?"

"Yes, honey."

'Who shot my mom?"

"I don't know, but Nick and Warrick are working on it and we'll get them, whoever they are. Right now, you just need to concentrate on your mom. She's going to need you."

Later, Nick showed up at the hospital. "Lindsey, you said you heard yelling before the shots?'

"Yea…" Lindsey was frightened.

"Can you tell me what kind of voice it was…. I mean, young or old….male or female?"

"It was a woman, I think. But I'm not sure."

"Okay, sweetheart. Thank you."

"What was that?" Gil asked Nick.

Nick led his mentor away from the others. "The bullets were from a 9mm Glock; law enforcement issue only. Gris, I'm worried about where this is going."

Grissom looked at Nick, his expression changing to horror as he realized what Nick meant.

"There were tire marks on the street from a peel out. Warrick is comparing the treads now but I can tell you, it's from an SVU or truck." Nick paused a minute before delivering his last bit of news, "And we can't find Sara."

Grissom let the last words sink in. Sara? She had done this? He was incredulous. She wouldn't do something like this….there must be a mistake. But somewhere deep inside he knew it was possible.

Nick continued, "Brass is looking for her. He's trying to keep it on the down low but the rumors are spreading already."

"Thanks Nick. I'm going to stay here and stay out of the investigation. If it is Sara, well, I'm going to be in the middle of it and I don't want my fingerprints on the investigation. Understand?"

"Gotcha. I'll keep you posted though." Nick left.

Later in the afternoon, Brass found Sara in a bar off the strip. He approached her carefully and slid into a chair across from her. "You been here long?" he asked.

Sara lifted her face toward him, her eyes bleary. She was obviously wasted. "Dunno." She was trying to focus on Brass's face but he was still a blur.

"Where were you this morning, Sara?"

"Dunno."

"Where's your weapon?"

"Dunno."

"Come on, Sara. Let me get you out of here and sobered up. All hell is breaking loose and you need to have a clear head."

"Okay."

Jim knew he should have taken her to the station but he took her to his house instead. He put on a large pot of coffee and started pouring it down her. While she was downing the brew, he called a lawyer that owed him a favor and asked that he meet them at the station in about an hour.

"Sara, I got you a lawyer. Don't say anything to me about last night, you understand?"

"Okay."

Everything stopped at the station when Brass led her inside an hour later. The lawyer, Jerry Wells, met them at the door. Brass took them to an interrogation room and let Wells consult with his new client.

Greg showed up to take some blood for a blood alcohol test. He was visibly disturbed by Sara's condition. For once, he had little to say.

Brass called Grissom to update him. "Gil, she's in bad shape. I don't know if she is the shooter or not, but I don't think she knew what she was doing if she is."

"At this point Jim, I don't care if she was drunk or not. If she did it, I'm finished with her. I'm just waiting to see what the evidence says. Right now, I don't think I'd believe anything she told me." His anger was palatable.

Gil ended his call and turned his attention to Catherine, now sleeping in her room. Lindsey sat next to her mother, watching. Lily had paced and finally walked outside for air. "Lindsey, honey, you haven't eaten. You need to eat something," Gil told her.

The teenager looked up from her mother's face, sadly. "But she might wake up."

"Look, the nurse said she'll be out awhile longer and the cafeteria downstairs has decent food." He reached in his pocket, pulling out some bills. "Why don't you go on down and get something and then when you get back, I'll go get a bite. We need to keep up our strength so we can be there for your mom." He handed her the cash and smiled encouragement at her.

"Okay, thanks Uncle Gil. You won't leave her will you?"

"I promise, I'll sit next to her until you get back."

Gil sat in the chair left empty by Lindsey. He found her hand and took it in his. "Cath, I am so sorry. If I hadn't been such an idiot last night, you wouldn't be here now. I promise, though, no one is ever going to hurt you again. They'll have to go through me to get to you. Please, just get better quickly."

He sat quietly, holding her hand and willing her to heal until her daughter returned.

At the station, Brass had stepped aside and requested another detective handle the investigation. He didn't want any questions about his involvement with the parties associated with the crime. It wouldn't be fair to Catherine or Sara, if his participation in the investigation tainted the result.

Consequently, Vartann was handling the questioning. Wells did his job and didn't let Sara incriminate herself. Vartann was frustrated but Jim was pleased. He knew things were looking bad for Sara but he didn't want to see her lynched.

By the end of the day, Nick and Warrick had matched the bullets to her gun and the tire marks to her tires. Nothing Sara said could change the evidence. Jim was convinced that she really didn't remember shooting Catherine, but she was still guilty. He stood miserably in the hall as Vartann had her cuffed and led to booking.

The investigation concluded, Nick, Warrick, Greg, and Brass headed to the hospital. Doc Robbins was already there. He filled the others in on her condition and there was a collective sigh of relief that she wouldn't suffer any long term consequences.

Each stopped in her room to wish her a speedy recovery and left. Doc Robbins patted Grissom on the shoulder and nodded, signaling that he wanted a word in the hall. The two men stood outside, close to her door. Robbins looked at his friend squarely, "She took a bullet because of you, Gil. When are you going to stop denying what you've felt for years? I know you can't see it, but Sara was another avenue of escape from your feelings for Catherine. It's time to be honest….with yourself and with her. You owe her that."

Wary at first, Gil considered his friend's words. As he searched his conscience he admitted to himself that there was truth in Doc's statement. Robbins saw that his words had landed and was content to leave it at that. He turned and made his way down the hall.

Early on Monday, Grissom's phone rang. It was Ecklie. Grissom was to be in his office at 10:00, "don't be late." Ecklie's office was the last place he wanted to be but he decided not to fight it and just get it over with. Therefore, he was prompt.

"Gil, this is a mess. The press has it and has made a huge office triangle romance out of it with you in the middle. Do you have any idea how it looks? What it does to the reputation of this department?" Ecklie waited for an answer but frankly, Gil had none.

"Obviously Sara is no longer an employee here. I told you that she was a loose cannon and you ignored me. I know you don't think much of me, but sometimes I know what I'm talking about. I was right about her."

Still no response from Grissom.

"Catherine comes off looking innocent in this, especially since she's the victim, so she's on medical leave. You are on administrative leave without pay, pending further investigation of the events and any role you might have played. Any questions?"

Grissom sat quietly, the chastised boy that he felt like. Ecklie was right, of course. He was doing what he had to do to protect the lab. "No, no questions. Just let me know when I can come back to work. I'll be available for any questions anyone might have.'

"And Gil, not a word from you in the press. Understand me?'

"Me not talking to the press…..when had that ever been a problem, Conrad?"

Grissom left Ecklie's office and walked down to his. He picked up some journals and books he wanted to read, closed the door and locked it. He wasn't sure when he might return…if ever.

One good thing, he thought. I can concentrate on helping Catherine. That is if she even wants to talk to me after what happened. He climbed into his car and headed back to the hospital. Maybe she wouldn't yell at him too loudly while she was still there.


	3. Chapter 3

Lindsey was sitting beside her mother when Grissom entered the room. He was relieved to see that Catherine was awake. When she heard him enter, she turned and smiled at him. "Uncle Gil, look she's awake," exclaimed the daughter.

"I see that. And looking bright and alert too." His relief was evident.

"Sorry I gave you guys such a scare," Catherine said weakly.

He stepped closer and studied her face, smiling. "I'm just glad you're going to be okay. We all are."

"So does anybody know what happened?"

Grissom glanced at Lindsey. He really didn't want to get into it in front of her. Subtly he nodded to Catherine and she understood that he would tell her about it later.

Brass went to visit Sara in lock up. She looked terrible. She also looked confused and depressed. "So, kid…..how's your head?"

"Don't ask," she snarled.

"Yeah, I thought so," he replied ruefully. "Gotta be honest here, this is looking really bad. Isn't there anything you remember?"

She closed her eyes to try to think but nothing came to mind. "No, I don't. The last thing I remember, I was in front of Grissom's place. His car wasn't there and I was really pissed. I started the car and drove away. Then I felt kind of sick and I pulled over in a parking lot somewhere. That's all I remember until you found me at that bar."

Jim thought for a minute. They had found her car at a lot near the bar. She must have stumbled into the bar and drowned herself more. But what happened between Gil's and the bar?

"You sure you don't remember going to Catherine's?"

"No Jim, honestly….I don't. The evidence says I did it, but I just don't remember."

"Well, hang in there kid. We'll get to the bottom of this."

Suddenly fascinated with her hands, she asked what was uppermost on her mind. "He's really angry isn't he? I mean, he hasn't even come to see me and …..hell, I don't blame him. I made a mess of it."

"Well, he can't come near you. The press is sniffing all around and Ecklie put him on leave without pay until we know the whole story. If he comes near you then it'll just make it worse for everybody." Jim had tried to sound convincing but they both knew Grissom well enough to know Ecklie's warning wouldn't impress him.

"Yeah….right. I know. Now this is messing with his career and he's really pissed."

"Sara, honestly….his career is the last thing he is thinking about right now."

Lindsey was showing signs of boredom and she hadn't eaten in awhile, so Grissom gave her some money and sent her off to find food. After she left Catherine turned to him, "So, give. What happened?"

"We don't have all the pieces yet, but Sara's in lock up." He said flatly.

"Sara? Why?"

"It was her gun and there were tread marks from her SUV outside of your house."

"Oh." Catherine was bothered by the news. It wasn't that she thought the younger woman wasn't capable, it just didn't feel right. "She's a pretty good shot. So why didn't she either kill me or totally miss me?"

"I don't know. She was pretty drunk. Still was when Jim picked her up."

"Jim brought her in?" That bit of news made her hurt for her friend. She knew it had torn him up to have to do that.

"Yeah, he found her in a bar. He thinks she can't remember what happened."

"Have you talked to her?'

"No."

"Gil, you need to talk to her. She needs to know that you will be there for her. And you need to hear her side of the story."

"I'm not there for her," he said vehemently. "And her side of the story is that she got so drunk that she doesn't know where she was or what she did. Convenient." His disgust was all over his face.

Catherine looked at him, shocked. "Gil, just talk to her. If you won't do it for her or for yourself, do it for me."

"Why do you want me to talk to her so much?"

"Because I'm having a hard time with this. And I'm not going to believe it until someone I trust tells me that they think she did it. She's not my favorite person, Gil. And I never liked the idea of the two of you together. But in my gut, I don't think she did it."

Unable to refuse her, he shrugged his shoulders. "Okay, I'll go over there after Lindsey gets back."

Two hours later he was standing in front of her in the holding cell. He wasn't quite sure how to begin. Jim had been right, she did look terrible. He had so many confusing emotions running through him. How could his heart be breaking and he be so furious at her all at the same time? Not to mention the disgust at her condition….what she had done to herself. He felt guilty but at the same time knew that she had made her own choices. He was utterly at a loss about how to proceed.

"You came?" she said looking at him; fear of his reaction to her was unmistakable.

"Yeah. I uh…." He paused, trying to control his feelings. Seeing her here….somehow he didn't have the heart to add to her misery. "I thought I should give you a chance to explain…." He hoped his voice wasn't too harsh.

Tears were working their way down her cheeks. "I'm sorry. I don't know what got into me at the party. If I hadn't been so stupid….."

"We both were acting stupidly, Sara. But I need to know what happened after." His patience was thin.

"I went to another bar and got really drunk. I passed out in the car, I think. Anyway….I woke up and drove to your place. Your car wasn't there. I thought you were with her and it really got to me. I left and was driving….then I felt sick. So, I pulled over and I think I passed out again, but I'm not sure. I don't remember anything else until Brass found me."

"Sara, Jim drove me home and dumped me. I spent the night alone, like I said I was going to. He came and picked me up in morning to get my car. It was after that I went by Catherine's and found her. I didn't spend the night with her. I wouldn't do that to you. You aren't ever going to be able to really trust me, are you?"

"Guess that won't be a problem now, will it?"

"I'm sorry, Sara. I'm sorry that I'm such a difficult person and that I struggle to be open with you and I'm sorry that your past won't let you trust me. However big a jerk I might have been, I would not have betrayed you like that. But you'll never really believe it, will you?'

Sara began sobbing. He was right; she couldn't trust him. As much as she wanted to, it just wasn't in her.

Gil felt terrible. He hadn't meant to make things worse for her. Once again, he had screwed up. "Look, this isn't over. Jim said he got you a good lawyer and I'm glad he took care of you like that. Evidence looks bad right now but Nick is still digging around. If it helps any, Catherine doesn't think you did it."

Tearful eyes sought his. "What do you think? Do you think I did it?"

His eyes were filled with tears that he refused to let fall. He sighed heavily before he replied, "I don't know what to think."

"Yeah, I thought so."

His cell began to ring. "Grissom"

"Uncle Gil, please hurry back. It's Mom, she's….please, just hurry."

He blanched at the panic in her voice. "Look, Sara, I'm sorry I have to go. I'll….well, I'll see you later." And then he was gone.

Gil rushed into her room. Lindsey ran to him, "I'm sorry…..she just woke up screaming and it scared me. She was so frightened and the nurses came running in like something bad had happened." Gil put his hand on her shoulder to reassure her but his attention was on Catherine.

"Lindsey, can you give Uncle Gil and me a few minutes, please," her mother requested. The child nodded and walked into the hall.

"Catherine?" Gil was surveying her, worried.

"I dreamed it, Gil. The shooting….I dreamed it. It wasn't Sara. I saw her. She was not as tall as Sara but she did have dark hair. I couldn't see her face, but she wasn't built like Sara at all. Not Sara's long arms and legs. And her voice….it wasn't anything like Sara's."

"Cath, are you sure that it just wasn't a dream. I mean, maybe you just don't want it to be Sara."

"No, Gil. I'm sure. It wasn't Sara."

Gil was in one of his trances, rolling this new information in his head. Then if it wasn't Sara why did the evidence all point at her?

He pulled out his phone and called Nick. "Nick, I want you to go over all of it again. This time be sure you…"

Brass claimed the honor of bringing in the shooter….the real shooter. She was the wife of a perp that Sara and Catherine had put away five years before. She had seen Sara at the bar and saw her chance. Sara had passed out and the woman, Molly Jenson, had lifted her keys and driven to Cath's. Sara had left her weapon in the truck and Jenson took advantage of that too. She had intended to spray the wall over the bed but apparently Catherine sat up while she was firing. Catherine's injury had been an accident. Jenson had only intended to make their lives difficult. Her fingerprints were found inside the glove box in Sara's car. When presented with the evidence and with Brass's not so gentle persuasion, she confessed.

Brass was waiting for Sara when she was released. He drove her back to her place. "Can I trust you to keep your head out of the bottle while I go get some food?' he asked.

"Yeah, Jim. I think I've finally learned my lesson."

He left. She headed for the shower and as she was toweling off she heard a knock at her door. She opened it expecting Jim. Grissom was standing there.

"Can I come in?"

"Sure." She was surprised to see him.

They sat, he on the sofa and she in a chair. "Look, Grissom….I uh….well, Nick said….well, anyway, thanks"

He managed a weak smile. "Sara, I think all of this….well, I think it ….that we…well, I think we need to take a break from each other. You brought something beautiful in my life and it has been the….a really happy time for me but there are some serious problems too, I think. And we both need time to sort all of this out….."

"Look, I know…I have some serious issues with trust and I have a hard time controlling my emotions, but I think I've learned a lot from this and….."

"It's not just you Sara. I thought…I thought you did it. I didn't believe in you enough to look past the evidence and ….."

"I understand. I mean, I keep screwing up and going off the deep end and at some point I know it ….wears thin."

"And there's still the issues that brought this all up in the first place. It seems we're right for each other in some ways but totally wrong in others. I can't …..I don't think I have what it takes….You've offered me something really special but I can't accept it. I'm sorry, Sara. As much as I care for you….love you….. I can't lose myself. And that's what's been happening. That man at the party the other night….I didn't recognize him. I don't want to be him. And if we stay together, that's who I will become."

"Grissom, no….this can't be … I mean I can do things better. I'll work harder….go to therapy….whatever it takes."

"I hope you will get therapy for the trust issues. I want you to be happy and one day you'll meet someone and….I want you to be totally ready for it. But I can't be that person. I'm taking some more leave to sort my life out and decide what I'm going to do next. Ecklie wanted me to fire you. I convinced him to let you resign and I'll provide references for you. Catherine said she will too. And of course there's Brass. You should be able to get another job without any problem. I'm really sorry to add to your misery but I just didn't see the point of trying to act like everything was okay. I don't want you to be hurt anymore. I do love you, Sara. I just can't be the man in your life. I'm sorry." He stood to leave.

Sara stood too, tears streaming down her face. It hurt Grissom to know that he was causing her pain. But he knew it would be worse later if he didn't stay strong now. "Grissom?"

"Yeah."

"One last hug, maybe. Just for luck?" she tried to smile.

He turned and wrapped her in his arms. His heart was breaking and he knew hers was too. It was the saddest moment of his life. Tears flowed and intermingled as both digested the finality of the hug. Finally, he withdrew his arms and turned, walking out of her life forever.


End file.
